Check out the top 10 funniest tweets of May! I looked at all the tweets I retweeted this month and with the help of my husband, Steve, and my friend, Jeff of Jeff & Jill Went Up the Hill, we narrowed the list down to the 10 funniest tweeted during the month of May. Then I included one of my own to make it 11 because… narcissist. Check it out!
Show these hilarious people your appreciation via RETWEET (people love to be RT’d), star or follow.
I think the elementary school music teacher was overly optimistic when she said we may recognize this next song.
— Northern Lights (@PinkCamoTO) May 2, 2016
Our neighbours are the type that run marathons. We're the type where, as we get out of the car, empty donut boxes fall out.
— Lorie (@LorieGZ) May 6, 2016
Mother's Day is a special day when I get to do the dishes and yell at people to stop making siren noises while I wear a macaroni necklace.
— Walking Outside (@WalkingOutside) May 8, 2016
Can't believe there are so many songs about love and only one where someone welcomes someone else to a jungle.
— Kashana (@kashanacauley) May 11, 2016
Sitting unused in a drawer, fighting back tears, the Fitbit softly sings to himself "…I would walk 500 miles…and I would walk 500 more"
— Super Randomish (@SuperRandomish) May 14, 2016
I DO like pina coladas, but cheating on my wife with my wife just seems exhausting.
— Steve Olivas (@steveolivas) May 14, 2016
"Why doesn't my son play with the other kids?" I ask myself as I stand alone, warily watching the other parents at the park from a distance.
— MyMomologue (@MyMomologue) May 16, 2016
JUDGE: Your ex-wife is claiming you have spent her money extravagantly
ME: [Segways up to mic] She's lying
— Jon (@ArfMeasures) May 16, 2016
*shoots a confetti popper filled with toothpaste and facial hair all over the sink and mirror*
— Mommy Cusses (@mommy_cusses) May 18, 2016
[Finally builds up courage to say hi to neighbor]
Neighbor: [Doesn't hear me.]
— Kate Hall (@KateWhineHall) May 20, 2016
I've often wondered if ax murderers hide in the woods or live in regular houses. Anyway, have fun camping this weekend son
— beth loves cake, so (@bourgeoisalien) May 20, 2016
All of these tweets made me laugh. How about you?
Links to previous Top 10 Funniest Tweets lists:
Want to read some of the funniest tweets about parenting from some of the funniest parents on Twitter? Check out The Bigger Book of Parenting Tweets, available on Amazon. Or the original, The Big Book of Parenting Tweets.