Check out the top 10 funniest tweets of August! I looked at all the tweets I retweeted this month and with the help of my friend Jeff of Jeff & Jill Went Up the Hill, we narrowed the list down to the 10 funniest. Then I included one of my own to make it 11 because… narcissist. Check it out!
Show these hilarious people your appreciation via RETWEET (people love to be RT’d), star or follow.
I know how pirates must have felt looking for a snug harbor, I've been searching for the perfect butter dish on Amazon for like 20 minutes.
— Mischievous Mike (@mstern68) August 15, 2016
Last week, I made plans to go out tonight with some mom-friends. Today, everyone cancelled.
Sometimes you find people that just get you.
— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) August 16, 2016
And then I realized, it wasn't brussels sprouts I needed to learn to like. It was myself…
— Megan Kelly Dunn (@megankcomedy) August 17, 2016
INTERVIEWER: How did Pink Floyd come to be?
ROGER WATERS: Well, when a Red Floyd and a White Floyd love each other very much…
— rachelle mandik (@rachelle_mandik) August 16, 2016
5yo: I'm going to kill everyone!
Me: Don't say "kill." It's not nice.
(5 minutes later)
5yo: I'm going to make everyone dead!
— Zoe vs. the Universe (@zoevsuniverse) August 16, 2016
ME: Mint choc chip ice cream, pls. I got my own cone [places it on counter]
EMPLOYEE: This is a traffic cone?
ME: You must be new here.
— mo (@chuuew) August 16, 2016
My WCW, as it is every week, is the entire cast of the Golden Girls.
— Father Drinks McGee (@drinksmcgee) August 17, 2016
I missed the entire two weeks of the Olympics because I was stuck at the grocery store trying to open a plastic produce bag.
— Kate Hall (@KateWhineHall) August 21, 2016
God: [creating Guy Fieri] "Hand me a head."
Angel: We're out of human heads.
God: "Hand me a pineapple."
— Elizabeth (@Elizasoul80) August 24, 2016
When I'm mad at my kid, I don't put the straw from the juice box in their school lunch.
— Sara (@sara_ashlynn) August 26, 2016
Look how instinctively, the mother croc carries the baby in its mouth. Nature is beautiful pic.twitter.com/mwDWpddoaG
— Amazing Puppies (@AmaziingPuppies) August 31, 2016
Bonus! I couldn’t stop laughing at this gif.
When you're at the community pool in your neighborhood showing off your Olympic diving skills. pic.twitter.com/ZB9EnDpYLJ
— The Refined Ruffian (@CulturedRuffian) August 25, 2016
All of these tweets made me laugh. How about you?
Links to previous Top 10 Funniest Tweets lists:
Want to read some of the funniest tweets about parenting from some of the funniest parents on Twitter? Check out The Bigger Book of Parenting Tweets, available on Amazon. Or the original, The Big Book of Parenting Tweets.